Deidara X Reader ~ Masks

“Do you think we’ll be on the same team, un?” The young blond asks, swinging high as the two of you spend your final evening as Iwagakure academy students at a big playground in the village, remaining after all the other kids have gone home.

“I don’t know, maybe?” You don’t have the same enthusiasm as Deidara, who’s standing on his swing to reach even greater heights, while you sway only slightly on your own.

“Maybe?” Deidara drops into a sit and skids to a stop. “Is something wrong ________, un?”  He asks, only now picking up on how different from your usual self you are. It causes him to look over at you with a little concern now. You don’t look back at him, but shake your head with an unconvincing sigh.

“You’re worried?” Your body freezes now as you feel your close friend’s arms wrap around you from behind. Before you can recover from this and answer, Deidara’s already come to a conclusion of his own and goes on talking. “Don’t be. We’re ready for this, un.” He tells you. “You remember how we used to play ninja even before we started at that academy, right?” It’s difficult to hide a smile from the blond as he reminds you of those times. The two of you had gotten into a lot of trouble in avertedly causing problems for the rest of the village back then. Deidara more often than you, but he always seemed to appreciate having you around anyway. You were one of the few people that didn’t annoy him, or find him annoying. The two of you had a lot of fun and, according to Deidara now, you might have learned something from all of that.

“And even if we’re not going to be on the same team,” he goes on “we still have tonight, un.” This said, the blond tries to lift you off of your swing. He doesn’t get very far once he’s done this before he falls over backwards, winded as you fall into him. It may not have been romantically whisking you away, but this failed attempt is enough to bring a more obvious smile to your face, along with a laugh. That’s the first one Deidara’s heard from you since the two of you met up today, so he guesses he can’t be too angry about that.

There isn’t much time for you and Deidara to do a lot more after that as it’s starting to get really dark, so the two of you have to head home.

“I can walk you back, un.” Deidara offers, as he has often done before. This time you turn him down however; there’s something you need to think about, something that’s been making you unusually quiet all of today.

“No thanks. If I’m ready to be a ninja, I should at least be able to do that on my own.” You give the blond one last smile before dashing off so he can’t argue against your point. Deidara stands there until you’re gone from sight, wondering just what it is about you and avoiding him today.

‘Being a ninja is about hiding your emotions.’ You think to yourself as you slow to a walk. ‘Getting rid of them so that they don’t get in the way of missions. That’s what everyone keeps saying... Deidara has to know that too, right?’



It turns out you and Deidara aren’t put on the same team when the decisions are made the next day. It’s kind of disappointing, but something you saw coming too. You hold back from the two boys you are put with so as not to let your sadness show.

“I’m Handa Seiji.” The first of your new teammates introduces himself to your sensei. He has a smug smile and flips his wavy dark hair. “The student who always achieved the best grades the academy had ever seen. I am clearly destined to become greatest ninja this village has ever seen as well.” You’re pretty sure you never heard anything about those achievements he’s claiming.

“Heh. That’s a lie.” You other teammate, Hashi Ryo, smirks as he glances at Seiji, arms folded. “The only times you did get those grades were when you cheated. Besides, none of that’s going to be useful out here in the real world.” Needless to say a fight breaks out between the two boys. Your sensei swiftly goes over to try and separate them. She briefly looks your way as she passes.

“I’m sorry; I don’t think you ever got the chance to introduce yourself.” She points out encouragingly.

“I’m _______ _______.” You tell her simply. She gives a weak smile before turning away from you to sort out the rest of her team. She appreciates having at least one sensible person in the group.

Despite their quirks your teammates seem nice enough by the end of the day you spend with them. You don’t open up to them though. They don’t really give you a chance with all the heated debates they get into, your sensei always having to step in. Time and time again you’re brushed aside and left forgotten completely as they move on. You don’t see much point in any more bonding after all that so once training is over for the day you head home alone.

Your day brightens a little when you catch sight of Deidara on your way. Not for the first time today, you hold back however. He may be your close friend but right now he’s talking animatedly with his new sensei and teammates. Whatever he may have to say looks pretty important. Not wanting to get in the way of that, you make your way past unnoticed.



“What’s wrong, un?” It’s been two weeks now since you’ve hung out with or even spoken to Deidara after the two of you were assigned different ninja teams. Now his first appearance involves dropping down from a low building onto you to ask this question.

“I could ask you the same thing Deidara.” You groan slightly from the floor you’re now lying on. He hasn’t left you in much pain with his surprise entrance.

“I was hoping for more of a reaction than that.” He tells you, disappointment evident in his voice. He gets off of you and pulls you to your feet.

“So... what has been going on with you, un?” Deidara breaks the silence with this question as the two of you walk through Iwagakure together.

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t play dumb. You’ve been avoiding me all this time, moping around the village by yourself, un.” He argues, coming to a sudden stop and causing you to do the same to look back at him. He stares you down for a moment, seeming a lot more upset with this avoidance than you are. A smirk creeps to his face when he sees that he’s not going to get a reaction from you in this way either. “I didn’t know you’d be that upset that you didn’t get to be on the same team as me.” You shake your head calmly at the conclusion he’s reached.

“No, that’s not it.” You tell him. “Since we’ve both become ninja, we’re meant to have stopped being so expressive, aren’t we? Put a mask on those emotions we used to have.”

“I don’t need to do that, un.” Deidara scoffs, cutting off your explanation before you can go on anymore. “And neither have any of the others. Or have you noticed a huge amount of other emotionless zombies showing up recently?” Not even his indirect insult appears to get a rise out of you as you just stare at the blond, as impassively as when the conversation began. “Besides.” He grumbles next, avoiding your gaze. “You only need to be that way on missions. You can still be yourself when you’re with friends, un...” You look down now, so that you don’t need to look at him either. You’re still not exactly sure how to explain what you have to say next.

“We haven’t spoken in a long time Deidara. I don’t know how to be around you anymore. Right now all I can do is hide behind that mask I use whenever I’m on my missions, or around anyone else...” You look up at the sound of Deidara stomping on the ground. As you might have been guessing, he looks angry.

“You’re the one that’s been avoiding me!” He shouts out and everyone else in the street looks over at the pair of you, suddenly intrigued. That doesn’t escape Deidara’s notice. He steps closer so that the two of you can have some privacy. “Just be yourself, un.” He tells you more softly this time, placing a hand on your shoulder. You look at this for a moment, preferring that to looking Deidara in the eye, then you shrug half-heartedly finally making known your uncertain response to his suggestion, and causing his hand to slip from you in the process.

His arms hang at his sides limply as you turn and start to walk away. Then the boy clenches his fists, and turns away to stomp off in the other direction.



The two of you don’t speak again after that. When you pass each other in the street you both ignore each other completely. You for your own reasons, but for Deidara it seems to be because he’s still so mad at you. You never see him getting into heated discussions with his teammates anymore either. It looks like he wants to keep that away from you too. Sometimes the only sign that he’s seen you at all is him turning around to walk in the completely opposite direction, away from you. As childish as that may sound this goes on for almost two years, right up until the day Deidara leaves Iwagakure altogether.

“Don’t let him get away!” The urgent chase goes on throughout the village, all around you as you walk home that day. Attacks are launched skyward as a big bird flies overhead, the target of all of this. There’s something familiar about the creature. When Deidara peers over the side you know why; the bird is one of the clay creations he’s always been so fond of making. You didn’t know that they came in this size though, or that they were able to fly. Have you really been out of touch with him for so long as to not have noticed these things?

The blond’s eyes narrow as they lock with yours. In the same moment another attack is launched. This one towards you as a more recognisable clay creation of Deidara’s plummets to the ground and explodes nearby. You can only stand there, frozen as you watch this happen. It’s the same when you’re thrown back by the blast, badly injured but alive.

“... Hm!” Deidara finally turns away from you after that. He’s seen all he wants to see.



“You’re an artist too, un?” He hadn’t expected to be captured so quickly. There was so much more he’d wanted to see and do, but being forcibly recruited by the Akatsuki had meant a lot of that had to go on hold. Deidara’s still defensive after being beaten by that Uchiha Itachi, someone whom he had taken an instant disliking to, but this discovery about his new partner Sasori is something he can’t help being curious about.

“Yes.” The redhead allows himself a small smile at the interest the kid is showing. Maybe having him as his new partner isn’t going to be the complete annoyance he had first thought it would be. He regains his composure however, remembering what he has already seen of Deidara’s art. “But we are nothing alike. Art is meant to be eternal, any true artist would know that.” Deidara’s face turns red with anger at hearing those words, any admiration he may have been starting to develop for the man gone. Soon after the first of many fights between the two artists takes place.

“You can’t win.” Sasori laughs lightly unleashing many more of his puppets upon the blond for each of the ones he destroys with those explosions of his. He bombards Deidara with them, burying him in such a way that it’s difficult for him to move and reach for his clay any more. It’s enough to start slowly suffocating him too, but Deidara is still all the more enraged by the words he can still hear Sasori speaking outside of his puppet tomb.

“I made myself a piece of my own art, a human puppet, enhancing my abilities and doing away with those useless emotions that you let control you so much.”

“Sasori.” With this warning tone, marking the arrival of the Akatsuki leader, the fight ends and Deidara is released. Though in his opinion there wasn’t a clear winner to that battle, Deidara still doesn’t hold any more liking for Sasori for a long time after that. He’s sick of masks. The one he’s sure Itachi’s using, Sasori’s and ________’s even still...



There’s silence as you walk out of the hospital, finally recovered from the attack you received from Deidara before he left the village. When you notice your teammates waiting for you outside the building you look up from the ground you had been staring at glumly and smile. They don’t return the expression and the quiet continues as they being to walk alongside you.

“... _______.” Seiji speaks up suddenly as you near your house. “You did the right thing, ignoring Deidara for all that time.” That wasn’t it. You hadn’t meant to ignore Deidara at all. Things had just turned out that way. “With all of the trouble he caused when he left, you did well to avoid being a part of that.” So he really is gone... honestly you thought you would feel more about that, or at least about the injuries he caused before leaving you behind. “But I can see that you’re unhappy.” Seiji goes on, oblivious to your thoughts being elsewhere. “I’ve... liked you for a long time ________ and it pains me to see you this way!”

You freeze up again in response to that out of the blue declaration. Ryo rolls his eyes with an annoyed sigh before leaving you and your other teammate to whatever it is that’s going to take place between the two of you.

“Ignore him too!” Seiji insists, before coming back to the topic he so recently brought up. “But please, don’t ignore my feelings _______. I... think I may have fallen in love with you over all this time. Do you feel the same way?” He asks, looking upon you with hopeful eyes and a smile to match. You’ve gone back to staring at the floor and have been all the while this boy has been talking about such things.

“Sorry.” You say after a long time. “I have somewhere I need to be.” You look up as you say these words, then brush past Seiji. He continues to gaze at where you stood, mouth hung open, as you make your way into your house.

Once there, you make your way to your bedroom and crash down onto your bed. How you wish it were easier to tell people how you really feel. It’s tiring sometimes, hiding behind the mask you’ve put in place and keeping others out. This is something you’ve learned to do all too well however. So well, that it’s becoming harder for even you to find yourself behind that mask.



“Tobi!” Deidara’s really getting sick of this. The new partner he was assigned after Sasori died is already infuriating enough, the literal mask he wears just makes him even more so.

“Aw, don’t be shy Deidara-Sempai. Tobi just wants to know if there was ever anyone you really liked.” Tobi goes on teasing as he had been doing before, making overly emphasised kissing sounds behind that mask of his and snuggling up closer to Deidara once this is said. The blond’s eye twitches just before he blasts the man away from him.

He takes off on one of his clay birds after that, leaving the masked man behind. Deidara might not be able to kill him, but there is someone he can do that to. Why had he thought of you in that moment when Tobi asked him that question? After all these years and that mask you put up to shut him out? He doesn’t know the answer to this question. He may never understand that stuff, but one way he decides will get rid of those memories will be to finally go back to his village and destroy the one they revolve around.



Things didn’t get any easier for you after you shot down Seiji’s declaration. You chose to ignore that it ever happened and Seiji, seeing that he wouldn’t get anywhere through loving you, gave up. You don’t get invited places by anyone else either, cutting you out of any involvement with them. Well, it’s not like you’d accept their invitations anyway. Though very unhappy you complete your missions well enough, steadily rising through the ninja ranks, but afterwards you always find yourself wanting to go straight home to get even further away from all the people you’ve unintentionally shut out over the years.

“_________.” This doesn’t change either when you arrive home one day to find the now Akatsuki Deidara sitting confidently on your sofa, a smirk on his face. His voice holds dark undertones when he speaks.

“It’s been a long time, un.” Seeing he’s not getting any response, the man gets up and walks over to you, still standing by the door and remaining unmoved as he gets closer. “You’re not happy to see me?... Or are you scared, un?” He questions in a low voice. There might have been a lot of things the man could have been expecting you to do in this situation. None of them were for you to walk straight past him and into your room. He watches, a little stunned, before following; he’s not about to let you get away with ignoring him like that.

He finds you lying in bed, back to the door and to him. The lights are off but you’re still wearing the clothes you just came home in. When Deidara walks around to the other side of the bed and crouches down to face you, he can see that you’re not sleeping either. Your eyes are open, but whether you’re seeing anything through them or not he can’t tell.

“Those times when we were younger, I’d ask you what was wrong and you wouldn’t tell me, un.” He reminds you, eyes narrowed. That mask you told him about so long ago, he always thought that there’d be at least something behind it. That you’d be able to be truly happy at the times when you let that wall down. He never thought that there would be nothing there, not even a hint of the person you used to be, the one he had wanted for you to be again so much before.

“It’s too late for that now!” He demands with finality, rising to his full height and readying his clay. There’s still something he can do for you, even if that is just to put you out of your misery, killing you for a reason so different from the one that had brought him here in the first place.

Your bedroom wall is what is blown to pieces however. Deidara curses himself for changing his mind at the last split second, but still grabs you from the bed and pulls your near lifeless body onto the giant bird he created at the same time as that explosion. He flies the two of you out into the night sky, the way cleared after that wall was blown away. The blond doesn’t have any idea yet what he’s going to do or where he’s going to take you, but for now none of that matters. You’re with him and, like it or not, he wants to do something for you.